When did you start wearing the Hijab? Oh, man.
Okay, so I started wearing Hijab three days before 9/11. But it was
like not... I would wear it to school. And I wore it because
my mom I remember growing up was like, "Oh, you should wear it."
But only to school. It wasn't something... Did your mom wear a Hijab? She
didn't really. But it was something that she wanted us to do.
Just kind of like, "Oh... "
They wanted me to wear shalwar kameez, that was 100%. They were like,
"You have to wear shalwar kameez at one point.
They refused to buy me "American" clothes, because they wanted to instill...
And I say, American obviously all of that is in quotes,
whatever that means. But they really wanted to... They didn't want us to
lose our culture. And I think there's a real fear for immigrant parents
that their children will no longer
understand love or uphold the same respect towards their cultural upbringing
that they did.
And so they very much wanted us to wear shalwar kameez. And then
at one point... So basically, my mom would tell me, "Oh,
you know I think you should wear the scarf." We didn't really call
it Hijab back then, we just called it a scarf.
And I remember I would wear it sometimes, and I would be like,
"Ma, they don't allow it in school. They say no hats in school,
so I can't wear it." So
I would say that every year, for two, three years. And then one
day I was just like, "You know what, I'm just gonna wear it, who
cares, whatever. I'll see if I like it or if I don't."
And then it was fifth grade, this was 2001, and...
Yeah, I put it on, and three days later 9/11 happened and
like now... It was interesting, because as soon as I put it on,
nobody really thought anything differently.
It was something that was normal I guess because they'd seen other people
do it, and they've seen their friends' moms wear it, or whatever the
case is. And it wasn't something like, "Oh my God. Why are you
wearing this thing on your head?
And again, I would only wear it to school. So if anybody saw
me after school, or at home, or wherever, it wasn't... I didn't have
it on me, so I wasn't like, "Rabia changed so much."
But I remember being really excited. It's gonna sound so stupid now.
But I remember being really excited that, after 9/11 Pakistan was something
that was...
People knew who Pakistanis were. And Pakistan was something that was known.
It was in the papers. I remember getting so excited reading...
'Cause we would have the New York Times and Daily News daily delivered
into our classroom
for social studies, or whatever, current events we used to call it.
But
we had to read articles or talk about what was happening,
in whatever, the real world. And I remember getting so excited that,
"Oh my God, people are gonna know where I'm from." Because it was
something that I had to constantly explain to people, or I would tell...
They didn't really understand where geographically my family came from.
But a lot... And then I was like,"They're gonna understand why I wear this."
For me I thought
initially that Muslims were in the news. I thought of it as a
positive thing, not because... I didn't obviously realize or understand
the connotation of what was happening. But to me it was like,
"Oh I'll be known. I no longer have to explain myself to people."
And then I realized I would actually have to end up explaining myself
to people for the rest of my life.